MAKING A POINT

Alex Devlin, 27 from Wellington, took to social media today to proudly share his Spotify Wrapped results, which showcased a meticulously curated lineup of artists no one else seems to know.

For the kiwis inclined to share their playlists, artists like L.A.B, Six60 and Taylor Swift were commonly included. However Devlin made a show of posting his own “wrapped” results to shine a spotlight on all the weird and wonderful bands he listens to, just to make the point of how different he is.

“My top artist this year was Velvet Echoes, this ambient dream-folk duo from Iceland. They only perform on fjords during the winter solstice—it’s super exclusive,” Devlin explained to our reporters from his Aro Valley flat.

Devlin’s second-most-listened-to artist, Petricor Flux, also raised eyebrows. “Oh, they’re this experimental post-jazz collective based out of a converted grain silo in rural Vermont. They release all their music on cassette tapes. It’s a vibe.

“It’s so authentic compared to, like, Six60’s factory-produced anthems.”

Asked about the widespread love for Six60, Devlin had more to say. “I don’t mean to sound harsh, but their lyrics are just… surface level.”

Despite his disdain for mainstream tastes, Devlin insisted he wasn’t judging others. 

“It’s fine if people enjoy Six60,” he said, pausing to adjust his vintage scarf. “Not everyone needs to be deeply connected to their music. Some people just want… noise. And that’s okay for them,” he said in disgust after our reporters revealed Six60 were the most streamed local artist in 2024.

More to come. 

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IN YOUR HEAD

Former members of the Irish rock band, The Cranberries, were surprised to see an uptick in streams they were getting in New Zealand this week.

Their song “Zombie” is connected to the spat between All Blacks centre/troll Rieko Ioane, and former Irish captain and current crybaby, Jonny Sexton.

In response to Sexton’s autobiography, where he whined about some of Ioane’s on-field hurty words, the All Blacks’ chief chirper responded on social media with the early 90s hit. The chorus by the late great Dolores O’Riordan famously starts with the words “In your head”, implying that Ioane’s sledging did exactly what it was intended to do.    

While Ioane has found some rent-free living space in Sexton’s top two inches, Noel Hogan, the Cranberries’ lead guitarist, is apparently not much of a rugby follower.

“I just happened to check our streams today and saw this strange spike in New Zealand of all places,” he said while sipping a pint of Guiness, of course.

“Zombie’s a great song, I’m still really proud of it. But why the spike? What’s going on down there?”

Sexton recently revealed in his book that in the final seconds of the World Cup quarterfinal last year, he had called Ioane a “fake humble f***er” after the All Black had said “enjoy your retirement you c***”.

Ioane took some time out from posting agitating memes online to talk to reporters.

“Hey the Cranberries are a great band, so happy to drive a bit more traffic to their song. And I hope Jonny’s enjoying his retirement,” he said, smirking.  

Meanwhile, rugby journalists around the country are “thrilled to have something different to write about”, now that this public feud is continuing.

More to come.

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The post Cranberries Song “Zombie” Experiences Sudden Spike In Spotify Plays appeared first on The Whakataki Times.