BREAD AND BUTTER ISSUES

Concern is growing across New Zealand as everyday drinkers continue to face what they are calling “unmanageable conditions” when purchasing beers, with many now openly asking why the Coalition has not stepped in to address the issue at a national level.

The cost of a standard pint has steadily crept up in recent years, leaving some Kiwis feeling like they are being forced into making “tough choices” between having four beers or “cutting back to a responsible three”.

Wellington office worker Jason Clarke says the situation has become “unsustainable”, particularly on Thursdays and Fridays. “You get to the bar and suddenly you’re looking at like $14 a pint,” he said.

“And you just think, how is this on me to deal with, you know? Bloody Luxon! There should be something in place. A rebate or a cap or some kind of traffic light system.”

Clarke says he has already taken steps to manage the pressure, including briefly considering going home after work instead of staying out.

“I looked at my budget and thought maybe I just have less beers,” he said.

“But then I thought actually, no, that’s not really addressing the root of the issue. That’s just me absorbing the impact.”

Others agree the responsibility should not sit with individuals.

“It’s the same as anything these days,” said Lower Hutt man Daniel Reeves. “You shouldn’t have to change your own behaviour. That’s what the government’s there for.”

Reeves says he would welcome a targeted support package, possibly including a weekly beer allowance or “some sort of subsidy for the first few rounds”.

Outside observers say the issue highlights a broader shift in how people view personal responsibility.

Local bartender Amy Ngata says she regularly hears customers discussing what “should be done” about the situation.

“There’s a lot of talk about solutions…” said Ngata, “…but not so much about people wanting to improve their own situations. That doesn’t seem to come up as much.”

At the time of writing, no policy announcements have come from any party, leaving many pundits wondering whether they actually know it’s an election year. 

More to come.

The post Still No Targeted Support For Kiwis Struggling With The Rising Cost Of Beers appeared first on The Whakataki Times.

SENSIBLE KIWI

A Manawatu commuter has devised the ultimate hack for saving on fuel as prices continue to rise: disassembling her vehicle.

Samantha O’Connell is an office worker in Palmerston North by day, says the global oil crisis has caused her commute to and from the CBD to become unaffordable.

“I am the face of the office, the person who greets all our clients. I just can’t work from home, but getting to work was costing me an hour’s wages!”

After hearing from Finance Minister, Nicola Willis, this week, O’Connell realised she knew exactly what she needed to do to overcome the fuel price crunch.

“Minister Willis was right. Us sensible kiwis already know how to be economical with fuel. Like, duh, of course I borrow my mum’s car if I want to go do groceries.”

The challenge, according to O’Connell, was not how to be economical, but how to save money. As of this morning, it’s a challenge she claims to have cracked. Beaming with pride, she explained:

“It was just simple physics, really. Take out the seats, remove the doors, pull out the spare tyre and rip off the hub caps. Easy! The total mass of my vehicle is down by 30%.”

O’Connell speculates that she is the first Kiwi to have figured out this fuel-saving hack, but encourages others to do the same. 

“Like honestly, you don’t even need any tools to do it. Just a really big knife and some brute force will do it.”

When asked if she had tested the performance of her newly modified vehicle, O’Connell was less enthused.

“Yeah, so I accidentally cut the ignition cable.”

O’Connell has since topped up her Snapper card and intends to travel by bus for the remainder of the week.

More to come.

The post Commuter Looking For Ways To Save Money On Fuel Removes Seats From Car appeared first on The Whakataki Times.

ELECTRIC SILENCE

Justin Price, 32, discovered the true cost of being different. While colleagues at his Christchurch office groaned about the skyrocketing petrol prices, Justin, a proud EV owner, found himself ducking behind his laptop to avoid “the shame of privilege.”

“It started on Monday,” Justin recalled, sipping his ethically sourced oat milk. “I mentioned, very casually, that I hadn’t filled up a petrol car in a while. Within two minutes, everyone was telling me how $3.10 unleaded 91 was going to bankrupt them, and I realized… maybe silence is golden.”

Indeed, petrol prices in New Zealand have surged dramatically, with unleaded 91 jumping 10 cents in two days, pushing the average past $3.10, nearly a 20% increase in less than a month due to the war in Iran. 

Diesel wasn’t spared either, climbing nearly a dollar to an average of $2.80. Fuel stations ran dry in some areas, panic-buying whispers filled the air, and Finance Minister Nicola Willis urged calm.

Justin, however, remained the elephant in the room.

 “I really wanted to say something about how I charge my EV car at home for the price of a café latte, but the office really wasn’t ready for that conversation,” he admitted. “Now, I just nod, make sympathetic noises, and occasionally ask which petrol station has the lowest price. It’s… complicated.”

Justin’s newfound restraint may be saving office morale, but it hasn’t come without internal suffering. “It’s hard,” he confessed. “Every time someone groans about paying $3.10 a litre, I want to scream, ‘I haven’t been near a petrol station at all!’ But then I remember that silence is cheaper than an argument, and probably better for everyone’s blood pressure.

More to come.

The post Local EV Driver Quickly Learns To Keep Quiet During Office Chat About Petrol Prices appeared first on The Whakataki Times.

SIDEWALK SAVINGS

Digby Jones, 33, from Christchurch, has heroically swapped his two-minute drive to the dairy for a ten-minute walk, citing “responsible petrol use” as fuel prices edge towards $3 a litre.

Jones bravely completed the ten-minute trek, all to save a few cents while global tensions in Iran keep petrol costs sky-high with a flow on effect to New Zealand.

“I just can’t justify $3 a litre for petrol. Not going to burn through that just to come grab a bottle of milk,” Jones said, puffing slightly, despite barely clocking up a kilometre.

Fuel prices across New Zealand have been climbing due to the conflict in Iran, pushing petrol in Wellington close to $2.89 per litre and Auckland around $2.60-$2.90.

New Lynn drivers are already paying $3.18 for unleaded, meaning people such as Jones are now voting with their feet.

“I’ve considered taking the bus, but then I’d have to interact with other human beings. That’s where I draw the line. Next time, I might even walk to the next suburb. Who needs petrol these days anyway?” Jones explained, feeling good about his stance against the global petrol chaos.

“Honestly, by the time I get back, I feel like I’ve done the dairy run and had a light cardio session. Double win!”

More to come.

The post PETROL PRICE CRISIS: Local Man Walks Ten Minutes To Dairy Instead Of Driving appeared first on The Whakataki Times.

HOLIDAY HARSHIP

Jaxon Donovan, 16, a King’s College student from Auckland, has admitted he is feeling the pinch of the “rising cost of living” after his family announced they would not be taking a third overseas holiday this year.

Speaking from his bedroom in his parents’ $4.4 million Remuera home, which overlooks the family’s private tennis courts, Jaxon explained that while he’s enjoyed trips to Bali and Greece, he had been hoping for a third European adventure, including stops in Venice and Rome.

“I was really looking forward to possibly going to Italy,” he said, scrolling through photos on his iPhone 17 from his previous trips. “I mean, Bali and Greece were great, but I was hoping to squeeze in another proper Europe trip before the end of the year. Looks like that’s not happening. Far out. Must be tough out there for everyone.”

When asked about his plans for coping, Jaxon said he might consider spending more time at the family bach in Wanaka. 

“It’s basically like a second overseas trip if you squint,” he said wistfully, “but still… not quite Italy is it?” Jaxon sighed.

His mother  Anna who was at the nail salon, weighed in on her decision to not do a third family holiday.

“I told him, ‘Jaxon, think of it this way: two holidays is actually more than most people get in a year.’ He looked at me like I’d suggested we cancel Christmas,” she explained while looking at $4,000 Gucci handbags online as she will not be travelling to Italy to get one this time.

More to come. 

The post King’s Boy Feeling The Cost Of Living Pinch After Only Getting Two Overseas Trips This Year appeared first on The Whakataki Times.

IT’S ROUGH OUT THERE

Tory Whanau gave her comms team an absolute bollocking today. 

It appears that the key messages they supplied her ahead of a Newstalk ZB interview failed to tell her not to say she’s doing it tough on $189,000 a year.

On Tuesday the Wellington mayor told radio host Nick Mills about how she’s had to sell her car to pay the bills, despite earning a very comfortable salary paid for by Wellington ratepayers. 

She apparently thought this would make her come across as down to earth and relatable, especially as she went to great pains to point out her “privileged position” multiple times. 

Senior Comms advisor at Wellington Council, Josie Hepburn says Whanau is regretting taking the interview in that direction. “Tory has calmed down now and has apologised to us for her outburst after the media reaction.

“It’s so hard for women right now because there’s so much misogyny in our country’s media,” she said without any hint of irony. 

“To be fair, probably not the best thing to talk about her own personal situation when there’s a lot of people on much, much less money than her.

“But she’s so brave just for putting herself out there and actually doing interviews with gross Newstalk ZB.”

Whanau would not comment on her personal budgeting, but she could well be allocating money into the wrong places, much like Wellington Council. 

More to come. 

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The post STRUGGLING ON $189K: Wellington Mayor Tory Whanau Regretting Her Attempt To Appear Relatable appeared first on The Whakataki Times.

MORE THAN THE BOTTLE ITSELF

Chris Gibbons clearly hasn’t been out in a while.

The 35 year-old from Christchurch, who was initially upbeat about going to a midweek birthday BYO, was in for a shock at how much corkage would be for the cheap bottle of wine he was bringing. 

“I’m assuming corkage will be a couple of bucks, like back in 2010 when I was in Wellington,” explained Gibbons, who has struggled in recent years to get invites to such events.

Gibbons, who hadn’t set foot in a BYO since his early 20s, was blissfully unaware that the price of corkage had skyrocketed. Upon arrival at the authentic Thai restaurant where his mate had made a reservation, he was immediately confronted with a grim reality. 

“The waitress just casually mentioned it—‘Corkage is $10 per bottle, sir’—as if she wasn’t basically robbing me at gunpoint.”

Despite his initial shock, Gibbons tried to keep his composure. After all, it was his friend’s birthday, and he didn’t want to be the guy who made a scene over a $10 corkage fee.

“I mean, we’re bringing the wine ourselves, right? Isn’t that supposed to save us money?” Gibbons ranted to our reporters.

“It’s not like they’re doing anything special with it! They just open the bottle and hand us some small cheap wine glasses! The corkage is literally more than the bottle itself! ”

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WHAT COST OF LIVING CRISIS? 

Logan Durran, a 29 year old customer service operator from New Plymouth, is a regular user of TVNZ+, a free streaming app he uses for light entertainment.

Previously Mr Durran has been a paying customer of both Netflix and Amazon Prime, but has had to cut both of these from his budget due to the rising cost of everything. 

But now with the news that TVNZ is going to set up their own subscription service, it seems he and his partner Ruby will need to cut back on a few essential items so they can continue receiving their exceptionally high quality content. 

Durran was doing his supermarket shop at Pak n Save when he spoke to reporters.

“Yeah it’s a bit annoying but I suppose I can cut down on the amount of meat I buy each week. Just got to do what we can to keep getting our TVNZ. Wouldn’t want to miss out on all the really great shows that are all better than Netflix and Amazon,” he said as he winced at the price of blade steak this week. 

“Maybe I’ll see if Ruby will be okay with turning off the heat pump and just layering up with blankets instead. Perhaps every second shower could be a cold one.”

As he grabbed two bottles of budget 2L milk, he spoke about the wider problem he and his partner face when it comes to being entertained in the evenings. 

“The big problem here is there’s simply no way of getting free TV from the internet. TVNZ was the one and only option. We’re left with no other choice,” said Mr Durran as he made his way to the cheese section. 

The shopper noted that the price of a kilo of Colby at Pak n Save had remained steady at nine dollars, but said that wouldn’t be enough to keep the TVNZ running. 

“Sometimes you just need to sacrifice and focus on the essentials.”

More to come. 

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The post Local Man Definitely Going To Start Paying For TVNZ Content That’s Currently Free appeared first on The Whakataki Times.

There’s more disappointment for Wellington flat hunters as the average rental price of a shoebox continues to rise. This comes as median house prices top $1m in the capital city.

Seventy five people turned up to the latest viewing, a shoebox formerly home to a pair of Hush Puppies leather sandals in Thorndon. Lucy Webb, 20, was hopeful about landing some prime cardboard real estate.

“I mean it’s a nice box, I was thinking I could make it work at $280 a week, but they were asking for $400. At least it didn’t have mould covering the ceiling (the cardboard lid) like the flats in Mt Victoria do.” said the Victoria University architecture student.

“But I would get a leak at some point and my landlord would likely ignore all requests to do anything about it, so it wasn’t worth the hassle. I’d rather my clothes just turn to mould in Mt Vic. Oh well, onto the next shoebox viewing!”

The Whakataki Times then tracked down shoebox landlord Craig Richmond to get his view on the rapidly burning out of control market. 

“Yeah, so what? I set the prices and they‘re the ones willingly paying it. No wonder nothing changes. I can always rent them my daughter’s doll playhouse if they’re that desperate!” laughed Richmond, owner of six homes in the capital city.

Wellington housing market expert David Goldstein offered his insight into the crisis.

“What we’d be saying to people in Lucy’s situation is to just find yourself a nice muesli bar box to live in for now, and then maybe look to upsize to a shoebox when prices calm down”, he coolly explained to the Whakataki Times reporters.

“I think in a year’s time people will be looking to move into the more spacious dishwasher box, which is great for a couple with two stable incomes.”

By the time Webb had walked back to her car, which had now copped a parking fine, the rental price of a muesli bar box had risen to the price of the shoebox she just viewed, which had itself risen to the price of a box formerly home to a 52 inch plasma.

More to come.

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