GORDON LIGHTFOOT | National
“JUST CALL ME GABBY”
Gabrielle Norman, an accounting assistant with a Hamilton insurance firm, has reportedly succumbed to the inevitable this week.
Despite being known as simply “Gabby” in her office, the 24 year old’s colleagues have expertly connected the dots between her actual first name, and the devastating natural disaster ravaging the North Island, Cyclone Gabrielle.
“Urgh god, I’m already over it,” Ms Norman told our reporters this morning. “The first time I saw on the news that they’d named a cyclone “Gabrielle”, I knew I’d end up with a new nickname.
“It would’ve been Nick who came up with that one. It’s always Nick. Noone’s safe around here,” she said.
Nick Mansford, the man accused of initiating Gabby’s new nickname, was not drawn on whether or not he was guilty of the crime. “Was it me? Not sure. It’s good though isn’t it? Cyclone Gabrielle! It suits her!” laughed the annoyingly talented sales star.
“Cyclone Gabby! Haha that’s better actually! Cyclone Gabby!”
Ms Norman told our reporters that she would not be making any complaints to HR, but would instead begin plotting her elaborate revenge. “Nah, HR can stay out of it. I’ve got big plans for Mr Mansford, more damaging than any bullying complaint could be.
“No-one f***s with Cyclone Gabby”.
More to come.
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