ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Politics
ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY GUTTED
Wellington Mayor Tory Whanau is reportedly heartbroken after the hikoi that swept through the capital this week wrapped up in a single day.
The protest over David Seymour’s Treaty Principles Bill, which saw somewhere between 35,000 and 50,000 people (depending on who you talk to), briefly turned Wellington into a bustling hub of energy and excitement—much to Whanau’s delight.
“It was like having a major festival in the heart of the city!” said Whanau, beaming as she surveyed Civic Square post-cleanup. “The energy, the foot traffic on Lambton Quay. It felt like it was Day One of the Wellington Sevens in 2007!”
Whanau admitted she had quietly hoped the hikoi would linger, citing its potential to “reinvigorate” the city.
“It’s no secret Wellington’s been a bit… subdued lately,” she said, carefully sidestepping the words “ghost town” and “dead “, as she prayed that Wellington’s public servants would just turn up to their place of employment instead of working from home.
“I can’t complain too much. For one glorious day, the streets were alive. Shops were full, cafes had lines out the door, and some of those protesters even looked like they might stay and order a flat white or pay for an over priced craft beer.”
Whanau was also pleased to report no issues with Wellington’s temperamental water infrastructure during the event.
More to come.
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