GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Culture
ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE
A mid-level manager at the Ministry of Business, Innovation and Employment (MBIE) has been overheard using the phrase “living the dream” for the seventh time this week, raising concerns among colleagues that he may be using the expression as a last line of defence against an impending personal crisis.
Mark Ferguson, 48, leads a policy team specialising in business transformation strategy frameworks — or at least he did, until the working group was disbanded by “the minister” via press release last month.
“Yeah mate, just living the dream,” said Ferguson with a hollow laugh, when asked how his week was going. Observers described the chuckle as “mechanical” and “haunted.”
Sources inside MBIE say Ferguson and his team have spent the better part of six months preparing a 92-page briefing document containing what they believed to be “robust, evidence-based recommendations” — all of which were confidently ignored by ministers who skimmed the executive summary before choosing “none of the above.”
“It’s just how things go,” said Ferguson, tightening his grip on a reusable coffee cup. “We write the advice. The government files it under ‘Thanks but no thanks’. Then we update the advice and send it again. Repeat until retirement.”
While his team quietly spirals into what HR calls “low-mood inertia,” Ferguson remains committed to maintaining a cheerful front in the kitchen area, where he’s known for saying things like “living the dream,” “another day in paradise,” and “at least the coffee’s free.”
“Just another busy day growing Aotearoa for all,” he said happily.
At press time, Ferguson had just received a request from the Minister’s Office to “shorten the advice down to a one-pager” — prompting a brief moment of silent reflection before he smiled and said: “All good! Living the dream.”
More to come.
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