ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Culture
SEASONAL SURGE
Jake Morgan, 29, had barely finished his second warm-up set at the gym on January 1 when he realised something was wrong.
“I just remember thinking, this is louder than usual,” Morgan said, glancing around at a busier than usual Les Mills gym. “Normally at this time it’s just me, the squat rack, and one other bloke who nods but never speaks.”
After enjoying what he described as “a solid, responsible eight hours of sleep,” Morgan arrived at his Christchurch gym at 6:04am, fully expecting a routine start to the year. Instead, he was confronted by an unfamiliar sight: dozens of people he had never seen before.
““Early January it’s like clockwork. You get a wave of enthusiasm, brand-new shoes and activewear kit from Christmas presents, along with absolutely no spatial awareness,” said the regular gym goer who had also made appearances on each of the public holidays to date.
Despite the disruption, Morgan remained calm, noting that experience had prepared him for the annual phenomenon.
“I’ll be honest, I just ride it out. You don’t want to judge, but you do,” he said. “By mid-February it’s back to normal. The selfies from the newbies stop, the benches free up, and the squat rack is once again respected.”
Morgan says he bears no ill will toward the newcomers, provided they understand their place in the gym ecosystem.
“Everyone’s got to start somewhere,” he said. “Just maybe not in my line of sight.”
At the time of publication, Morgan had already adjusted his training schedule by seven minutes to avoid peak enthusiasm hours, confident that “nature will take care of the rest.”
More to come.
