All Blacks Fan Reports Feelings Of Anger Every Time Damian McKenzie Smiles At The Goalposts

angry all blacks fan with smiling damian mckenzie in background

GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Sport

STOP SMILING AND KICK IT

Retired All Blacks fan Brian Morris has always been annoyed by first five eighth Damian McKenzie’s goal kicking ritual. 

McKenzie has become known for the idiosyncratic way he lines up the goal posts for his kicks. He typically takes a first look up at the posts, and then looks down at the ball, and then looks back up at the posts with a wide grin as if he’s just remembered a classic joke, before getting his head down again to take the kick.

The routine typically gets a cheer from fans watching in the stands, and has earned McKenzie the nickname of “the hyena” in some circles. 

But for 68 year old Brian, things have come to a head. 

“That stupid smile, every time, just kick the bloody ball! Silly boy you’re a professional athlete, stop bloody smiling,” he said, apparently angry that McKenzie is not taking his job as an All Black seriously enough. 

“McKenzie’s always pissed me off with that, and now he’s run out the shot clock because he was too busy smiling at the goal posts and thinking about God knows what. Almost cost us the bloody game!

“What happened to professionalism? Robertson should bench him for that blunder. I’d bench him just to wipe the smile off his face,” spat Brian as he reached for an ibuprofen for his back that had been playing up again. 

McKenzie was able to see the funny side of timing out the shot clock when he spoke to the media post match, but admits it would be a different story if they’d lost.

While he owns the mistake and says he will sort out his process to speed things up, Mr Morris says he will make no such changes to his own outlook, and will always hate Damian McKenzie for smiling so much. 

“Just stop smiling and kick the f***ing ball!” 

More to come. 

Big fan of the Whakataki? Use the form on this page to become a Whakataki backer. You can also follow us on Insta.

Enjoying the Whakataki Times and want to say thanks? Now you can! Use the form below to make a financial contribution to the team’s operating costs. 

How much do you reckon?

Up to you how much