GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Culture
ALL FOR NOTHING
Local gym bro Kayden Walker, 23, had egg on his face today, and that’s not including the egg that slid out of the side of his burger.
The marketing grad spent an hour and a half at City Fitness Upper Hutt this evening, doing weight training and cardio, allegedly in an effort to burn fat and build muscle.
However this narrative crumbled dramatically when his workout came to an end, as he ended up driving straight from the fitness centre to BurgerFuel on Main Street.
“Not sure what happened there. Instincts just took over and before I knew it I was standing there ordering a Biofuel burger and spud fries,” said a bewildered Walker.
“I can barely even remember being at the gym.”
Friend Regan was at City Fitness with Walker shortly before the incident occurred.
“He said he was going to go home and have the chicken and green veggies he’d organised to cook tonight,” he said, shaking his head in disbelief at the own goal his friend had just scored.
“Was that a lie or did he forget on the way home? Man, so many carbs”.
Walker then began crafting a new lie about how he was always going to get a burger, but he decided late that he would go to the gym beforehand to counteract the calories.
“Initially I was just going to have takeaways and not go to the gym. So what I’ve actually done is way better than what I was going to do.”
Walker would not say whether the chicken in the fridge would be alright for tomorrow.
More to come.
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