ROSEMARY ABBOTT | National
TINY TOWN TROUBLES
While catching up with some friends and acquaintances in Wellington over the weekend, 29-year-old Kane Webb found himself once again opting for geographical vagueness rather than attempting to explain the existence of his small hometown, Te Kūiti (population: just under 5,000).
“Yeah, I just said I’m from the middle of the North Island, sort of near Taupō,” said Webb, who was simply not in the mood for follow-up questions about sheep shearing history or whether it was “anywhere near Hamilton.”
“It’s like having a job where you do something weirdly specific and can’t really explain to people what you do. That’s what it’s like being from a small town. You just can’t be bothered,” he explained, also fending off questions about whether everyone from there was related.
Webb said previous attempts at honesty had backfired, often resulting in blank stares, confused furrowing of brows, and people pulling out Google Maps at the pub.
“I mean, at least I’m not from Palmy or Hamilton though haha.”
At press time, Webb was overheard telling someone he’s “from around Rotorua-ish, depending on how you drive it.
More to come.
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