Rugby Coach Detects Rain And Instantly Messages His Soft Players To Say Training’s Still On

rugby coach with whistle and players training in background.

ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Sport

NO EXCUSES

Rugby coach Craig Saunders knew that as soon as the skies turned grey and a drop of rain fell, that he’d be inundated with texts from a particular group of players in his rugby team.

Saunders, who is coach for the Old Boys University Senior B team in Wellington, decided to get on the front foot and fire off a text to a group of about six of the guys in the side, all coincidentally in the outside backs. The same ones who are usually “no shows” when the weather turns wild.

“It’s always the same group. They see one drop of rain and then decide in their own minds that training must be off for some reason and they’ll be planning their excuse not to come. They’ll be messaging each other and probably asking if training is still on and hearing what they want to hear, the soft cocks..” said the veteran coach of 22 years who has seen it all before.

Our reporters were privy to see Saunders’ text message, which read “TRAINING’S STILL ON, RAIN OR SHINE! SEE YOU AT 6PM!”

“I mean, if it’s raining on game day they definitely know the game isn’t off. Why would it be any different with training? The message is loud and clear, the rain is just a minor inconvenience and irrelevant to what we are trying to achieve this year as a team.”

“Some of the students are the worst for not turning up. They start claiming they’ve got to study for an exam. That’s basically code for, ‘I’ve seen it raining throughout the day and I don’t want to leave the comfort of my hall of residence’.”

As his players arrived at the field looking utterly miserable in the pouring rain and gale force winds, he watched them with a sense of pride and proclaimed “It’s the trainings you don’t want to go to that are the most important. Nothing like the rain to toughen up you soft cocks”

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