Smug Millennial Eagerly Asks “How Was All The Sportsball Over The Weekend?”

pink haired hipster girl thinking about the all blacks and warriors losing.



Wellington based millennial and active opponent of all things sporting, Ruby Galbraith basically ran into the office this morning. 

The 29 year old was completely across the two main sporting results of the weekend, knowing that both the All Blacks and the Warriors had suffered disappointing losses in important matches. 

Casually bumping into Sam Ellison and Josh Orr in the kitchen making coffee, Galbraith innocently asked them “Hey guys, how was all the sportsball over the weekend?”.

While most kiwis would empathise with the disappointment of the two teams and their fans, Galbraith instead chose to weaponize the weekend’s results against her sports-mad colleagues.

Sam and Josh simultaneously winced as they weathered the attack launched by the pink-haired assassin. Sam decided to take the heat this time and replied “Morning Ruby, nah not great. You haven’t heard anything about the ABs and Warriors huh?”, knowing that she knew exactly what she was doing. 

“Oh nah haven’t heard anything. Why? Did the All Blacks and Warriors lose or something?”, she asked disingenuously with a smirk, while absolutely marinating in self-satisfaction.

Before either man could think of anything witty to say in response, Galbraith was already loping off to her desk, saying, “Sorry guys, gotta run to a morning stand-up, but I’ll catch up later. Up the Wahs!”.

The two were left fuming and staring at each other silently. “I reckon she actually watches every game just so she can torture us, said Josh. 

“Probably secretly loves it, ay, sportsball…

“Loves a bit ‘a sportsball…”

More to come. 

Big fan of the Whakataki? Use the form on this page to become a Whakataki backer. You can also follow us on Insta.

Enjoying the Whakataki Times and want to say thanks? Now you can! Use the form below to make a financial contribution to the team’s operating costs. 

How much do you reckon?

Up to you how much