MO’UNGA RETURNS: One Eyed Cantab In Hospital After Falling Off Chair In Excitement
RETURN OF THE KING.
TAB Scraps Crusaders Win Option For Home Playoff Final, Cites “Pre-Determined Result”
FOREGONE CONCLUSION.
Crusaders Fans Gutted About Extra Game Before Trophy Lift
CROWN THE KINGS NOW
Smug Millennial Asks Office Jocks If They’re Looking Forward To The Big Sportsball Game Tonight
SUBTLE TROLLING.
Crusaders Fan In Fear Of Blues Upset And Inevitable Rieko Instagram Post
RIEKO’S RIDDLE.
Crusaders Fans Annoyed They Have To Play Semi-Final Before Final
SEEING RED
One-Eyed Cantab Dismisses Crusaders Home Loss To Moana Pasifika As An Elaborate Deepfake Scam
FANTASY LAND.
Crusaders Fans Start Visualising June Championship Parade After Blues Demolition Job
IT’S COMING HOME!
HAPPY VALENTINE’S: One Eyed Cantab Finalises Divorce Papers To Focus On More Important Relationship
LOVE AND LOYALTY.
Craig Chamberlain, 59 from Shirley, Christchurch, is now free to fully focus on his beloved Crusaders after finalising his divorce from his now ex-wife Diane.
RAZOR’S WISHLIST: Scott Robertson Asks Santa For Enough Japanese Yen To Buy Back Richie Mo’unga
SLEIGH FULL OF YEN.
All Blacks coach Scott “Razor” Robertson was spotted perched on Santa’s knee at Christchurch’s Northlands Mall today, clutching a handwritten wishlist. Top of the list: “Enough Japanese yen to buy Richie Mo’unga back.”
