“Told You Not To Go Into Politics You Bloody Idiot” Says Uffindell’s Old Man

Uffindell on the phone



As if National MP Sam Uffindell didn’t have enough to deal with at the moment, with more allegations coming to light about a pattern of violent behaviour, the embattled member for Tauranga has just received an earful from his old man.

“I told you, didn’t I?! Told you to forget about politics, but no, why would you listen to your stupid old father?” said a recorded voice message obtained by the Whakataki Times. 

“I said stick to banking, keep your head down and make your mark fighting against criminal money laundering. Nothing wrong with just doing that! Just make a perfectly good, honest mark on the world, away from the limelight.

“But no, you wanted to be a big shot politician, didn’t you? Probably thought you could be prime minister, didn’t you?! 

“Embarrassed your whole bloody family again, for the same thing. Your poor mother was in tears when you got kicked out of that school for being a bloody dickhead. Unbelievable!

“Now we’re re-living it all over again! I specifically told you that these things don’t just disappear, your past doesn’t just go away. If you’re in the limelight with that many people looking at you of course this stuff’s going to get dredged back up.

“And what’s this about you trashing your student flat in Dunedin??! I didn’t know about that!

“I should call Luxon right now and tell him to drop you from the party and box your ears while he’s at it!”, roared the infuriated father. 

At that point in the voice mail message there was a long pause, presumably where Uffindell’s father composed himself somewhat, moving from being outwardly angry to just being concerned for his son.

“God, I dunno.. What do you do now? Go back to banking? Everyone knows your name and your face now, who’s gonna take a risk hiring you?

“Gahh, anyway, see you on Sunday for lunch”, said the deflated dad. 

More to come.

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