“All I Want For Christmas Is To Be Left TF Alone”

woman alone in flat


Jodi Cullum, a 30-year-old middle manager notorious for her resting bitch face, is hoping to avoid family Christmas celebrations and instead enjoy some time alone.

Cullum has spent the last 12 months battling through employee disputes, policy changes and personal grievances at work, and her personal life has been plagued by Bumble bungles and Tinder terrors. All in all, 2023 has been a year in which she felt everything other than thriving.

As we approach the holiday season, Cullum says the only thing that could make her year worse would be to spend time with her parents. But what is she seeking instead of some holiday cheer? “A box of wine and some peace and bloody quiet.”