GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Culture
DESPERATE TIMES
40 year old Katie Herbert, mother to boys Jack, 6, and Elliot, 8, is already at the end of her tether this holiday season.
Ms. Herbert has been leaning heavily on the story that if Jack and Elliot don’t start listening to their mum and dad, then Santa won’t come and deliver them any presents. Their behaviour had slipped noticeably, as everyone in the Herbert household is tired from a busy year, and the routines have largely gone out the window.
“Jack put that down!” she said while foolishly taking both children Christmas shopping at the Upper Hutt Farmers store. “Santa’s still watching, remember. He still might not come!”
As Herbert dealt with her youngest son and took away the large ceramic bowl he was holding casually, eight year old Elliot was able to suddenly vanish without a trace.
“Elliot!? Elliot, where are you?” she called, her voice getting progressively more panicked as she peered down the aisles. “Elliot, I’m on the phone to Santa right now, he can see everything you’re doing!”
When Elliot was finally found looking at Marvel figurines in the toy section, his mum was able to stop to talk to reporters.
“At the start of December, the Santa threat got the job done every time. I had them tidying their rooms, doing extra jobs for me, it was great!
“But now I’m not sure if they even believe me when I say they won’t get any presents. I mean yes, the threat is completely empty, but surely I should be able to tell a convincing lie to a six-year-old and an eight-year-old. Right?” she asked hopefully.
Before she could elaborate further, Herbert cut her interview short to stop Jack from pulling all the Squishmallows out of their display stand.
More to come.
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