GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Culture
TOO MANY HOURS IN A DAY
Krystal McKinskey, a 25 year old from New Jersey, is taking practical steps to counter the looming “Tiktok ban” in the United States.
The customer support pro admits she does not post much on Tiktok herself, but she does use the popular video sharing app to make hours of her day vanish, seemingly instantaneously.
McKinsey says she is on the lookout for any new apps that could fill the void that TikTok is about to leave.
“I use Instagram reels and Youtube shorts a bit. They try to copy the TikTok scroll, but it’s just not the same. There’s something special about the Tiktok algorithm that really makes the day disappear instantly and permanently,” she outlined fondly.
“Like, the world is just so boring you know, there’s literally nothing to do out there. I don’t know what people used to do all day?”
US President Joe Biden made the decision that the Chinese app would be banned in the US from this Sunday (American time) unless ByteDance was able to sell the American operations to an American buyer. Incoming President Donald Trump has said he will review this decision when he comes back into office next week.
Ms. McKinsey meanwhile is open to any and all suggestions for how she can continue to delete precious time from her life without TikTok.
“I tried X this week, but things just seem a bit angry on there. Hmm, maybe another streaming platform? I’ve already got three I pay for, but the problem with them is it’s not so easy to swipe away a TV show if it’s not doing it for you.
“I dunno, maybe I should try painting or something. I’ve heard people say they lose track of time when they get into it. Maybe that could be me!” she mused, not realising she may have just stumbled upon a worthy pursuit.
The interview then ended abruptly as McKinsey wandered off with her head in her phone, apparently extracting the final few moments of TikTok content she could.
More to come.
This story was brought to you by the good bastards at Fat Bastard Pies. Order some of their hefty pies online and have them delivered fresh overnight, anywhere in NZ.
