ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Sport
COTTON-WOOLED CRYBABIES
Percy Wright, 72, longtime regular at the downtown pub in Oamaru, settled into his usual spot at the bar on a weekday to watch the Super Bowl in between horse races.
Armed with a pint of lager and decades of sporting wisdom, Wright did not hold back on his assessment of the American NFL spectacle.
“They’re too bloody soft,” he said, shaking his head as another commercial interrupted the game. “All that padding, all those helmets… back in my day, if you got hit, you’d tape yourself up and just get on with it!
“The players may as well be wearing bubble wrap! In rugby, a real man’s game, we got up with mud in our eyes and blood on our faces! That’s contact sport!”
Watching the ball disappear into yet another quarterback huddle, he muttered, “I’d be surprised if the ball was in play for more than five minutes in the whole game. Five bloody minutes of ball in play and the game takes five hours!”
When asked what he thought of the helmets directly, Wright scoffed. “Helmets? Back in my day, if you wanted to protect your head, you used a bit of common sense. Maybe a tough skull. That’s all you needed.”
By the end of the game, Percy had made it clear that NFL footballers could never compete if they tried rugby union. “Too bloody soft!” he concluded.
More to come.
