GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Culture
MUSCLE MEMORY
A Palmerston North man has confirmed that despite not touching a calculator in nearly two decades, his body still instinctively remembers the exact sequence required to spell “BOOBIES” upside down.
The incident occurred Tuesday evening after 34-year-old Ryan Fletcher discovered an old Casio calculator while cleaning out an oversized Sistema container in his garage.
According to Fletcher, the device still had enough battery life to perform what he described as “the only calculation he regularly referred back to.”
“I didn’t even have to think about it,” said Fletcher, holding the calculator like it was an artefact found at some archaeological dig. “I turned it on, typed 5318008, flipped it upside down and just started grinning at it, with no one around me.”
Fletcher said the move felt “completely automatic,” comparing it to riding a bike or backing out of a very familiar driveway.
“You spend all of intermediate trying to get the biggest possible reaction from any and all boys that may be nearby. This knowledge is going to stay in my brain for life.”
He admitted he briefly considered showing his wife before deciding the inevitable eye roll wouldn’t actually be worth the effort.
Friends who later heard about the discovery were reportedly unsurprised.
“Makes sense that Ryan remembers calculator boobies but forgets literally any important password,” said mate Josh McKenzie. “If civilisation collapsed tomorrow, the rebuild would be very difficult but I think men would still find a way to write boobs on things.”
Fletcher reportedly also attempted to spell other words on his newly discovered Casio, but was never able to out-do the GOAT.
More to come.
