Man Follows Up Christmas Lunch With Shame-Induced Boxing Day Run

man running near lake Taupo thinking about all the food he ate at christmas

GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Culture 

MAKING UP FOR IT

Taupo based Christmas overeater Matt Murchison is trying to make amends today. 

True to form, the 31 year old absolutely gorged himself on rich foods and desserts yesterday, so much so that he woke up this morning with what he described as a “food hangover”, which he layered over top of his regular hangover. 

“God I felt average this morning. Like two hangovers at the same time. Something had to be done,” he said, clearly feeling the shame of it all. 

The financial advisor described how he dragged his uncooperative body out the door to perform something resembling physical exercise. 

“I honestly felt like I’d gained ten kilos from a full day of eating and drinking. Would not be surprised at all,” he explained.

“I knew if I didn’t do something today, it would slide into tomorrow, and then the next day. Knew where my shoes were, so I just focused on getting them on.

“As I began running, I could feel the whole front layer of my torso jiggling up and down. It was an unfamiliar feeling and I’d hate to be an innocent bystander and have to see that,” he said, shaking his head. 

Murchison claims he went the full five kilometres without stopping, as he intended, but conceded that his pace wasn’t breaking any records. “At this stage it was a victory just to make it out the gate,” he said.

Murchison reportedly still has a significant volume of leftover food in his fridge, and time will tell whether he will continue eating until it’s all gone. 

More to come. 

Big fan of the Whakataki? Use the form on this page to become a Whakataki backer. You can also follow us on Insta.

Enjoying the Whakataki Times and want to say thanks? Now you can! Use the form below to make a financial contribution to the team’s operating costs. 

How much do you reckon?

Up to you how much
$