Razor Promises He Didn’t Just Select TJ To Make The Haka Look Decent

Scott Robertson in front of TJ Perenara haka.



All Blacks coach Scott “Razor” Robertson has slapped down rumours circulating through the media today.

Word on the street was that he selected Hurricanes half-back TJ Perenara in his All Blacks squad just to ensure the New Zealand team performed a frightening haka in the upcoming tests against England and Fiji.

“Listen,” Razor began, “I promise you TJ Perenara isn’t just here because he can lead the haka. Sure, his mana and presence in the pre-match ritual are unmatched, and somewhat terrifying for the opposition, but let’s not forget that he’s a damn good half-back too.”

“We’ve got Finlay Christie and Cortez Ratima, both exceptional talents, challenging TJ for the starting spot. This isn’t about a cultural showpiece; it’s about selecting the best player for the job on the rugby paddock, which does happen to include the pre-match,” he told a press conference full of confused reporters. 

“Finlay’s damn good too but he won’t be adding anything to the haka, will he? I mean, have you seen him?”

Perenara could not be reached for comment as he was allegedly practicing Ka Mate and Kapa O Pango, alone and angry on an Upper Hutt training field.

More to come. 

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