Smug Millennial Drafts Series Of Anti-Luxon Tweets Ahead Of Election Win

pink haired millennial displaying her tweet about chris luxon

ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Politics

PREPARING FOR GAMEDAY

Pink-haired millennial Ruby Galbraith is preparing herself for a big week on Twitter, now also known as ‘X’.

With the New Zealand election likely to see a new Prime Minister come Saturday evening, the 30 year-old from Wellington’s Aro Valley has carefully drafted up multiple anti Christopher Luxon Tweets ready to launch.

“Just another pale white male in a suit!” Galbraith shouted at our reporters, a comment she plans to later Tweet about the National Party leader.

Our reporters then watched Galbraith type away on her Macbook Pro, where she plans to bring down a likely National led government one Tweet at a time. 

“Christopher Luxon wears organic cotton shirts but probably can’t even tell you where the nearest farmers’ market is. #FakeEcoWarrior #CapitalismInSheep’sClothing,” she huffed, typing and saving the Tweet in her drafts folder.

“Luxon probably thinks climate change is just a new flavour of organic ice cream. #MeltedIceCapsNotMeltedHearts #NotMyPM” 

As Ruby began to build up a head of steam she began to effectively start talking in Tweets to our reporters, failing to realise it takes more than a few social media posts to bring down a government, especially when they’re all just reaching the followers inside her echo-chamber.

“Luxon’s idea of sustainability is buying a reusable coffee cup but never actually using it. Eco hypocrisy!”

More to come. 

Big fan of the Whakataki? Head over to the support page and become a Whakataki backer. You can also follow us on Insta.

Enjoying the Whakataki Times and want to say thanks? Now you can! Use the form below to make a financial contribution to the team’s operating costs. 

How much do you reckon?

Up to you how much