Wellington Floods Deemed To Be Punishment For Tolerating Bucket Fountain
STORM SENTENCE.
Luxon Says “Compliment Circle” Will Boost Self Confidence And Self Worth Ahead Of Election
BACKING EACH OTHER.
Still No Targeted Support For Kiwis Struggling With The Rising Cost Of Beers
BREAD AND BUTTER ISSUES.
Luxon Unveils Dramatic Makeover And Rebrand To Improve Poll Results
STRANGELY FAMILIAR.
Manager Of New Staff Member Excited By Opportunity To Say “Oh You Came Back For Day 2”
BACK FOR MORE.
Disgruntled National MPs Creating AI Agent That Could Topple Luxon
POLL POSITION.
Local Man Gets The Double After Packing Dishwasher Wrong And Putting Dishes Away Wrong
WINNING WAYS.
One Eyed Cantab Vows to Gallop Endless Circles Around New Stadium Until Horses Return
NEIGH SAYERS.
New Migrants To New Zealand Will Now Be Force-Fed A Flat White And Told To Enjoy It
COMPULSORY CULTURE
Blues Fan Prepares To Blame Wellington Wind And Cyclone Ahead Of Canes Clash
METEOROLOGICAL SABOTAGE.
