Kiwi Bloke Reckons He “Bleeds Maroon” Despite Never Setting Foot in Queensland

KIWISLANDER.
Uni Student Getting Straight A’s Despite Sub-Optimal Diet Of Mostly Two Minute Noodles

NOODLE KNOWLEDGE.
Crusaders Fans Gutted About Extra Game Before Trophy Lift

CROWN THE KINGS NOW
Bloke Insists Paintball Was ‘Just a Bit of Fun’ Despite Being Covered In Painful Welts

BRUISED EGO.
Smug Millennial Asks Office Jocks If They’re Looking Forward To The Big Sportsball Game Tonight

SUBTLE TROLLING.
Crusaders Fan In Fear Of Blues Upset And Inevitable Rieko Instagram Post

RIEKO’S RIDDLE.
South Island Bloke Still Pretending It’s Not Cold Wearing Gumboots And Stubbies

SUB ZERO SWAG
Crusaders Fans Annoyed They Have To Play Semi-Final Before Final

SEEING RED
Gym Goer Endures Gruelling 3-Minute Workout To Earn Right To Post Insta Selfie

SQUAT, SNAP, SHARE.
Kiwi Bloke’s “Big OE” To Include Same Mates From Home But In Different Time Zone

MINIMAL SHIFT.