GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Local
“FARRKIN INDICATE C***!”
80 year old Mavis Anderson underwent a total personality transformation this morning, when she hopped in the driver’s seat of her Mazda 2.
While normally cheerful and happy to see you, Mavis apparently becomes a red hot ball of rage whenever she’s behind the wheel. Grandson Jackson was in the car with the retiree when he witnessed the full complement of his grandmother’s vocabulary.
“Far out nana can swear ay, never heard that before from her. She gave me a ride to work this morning and geez, she’s like a drunk sailor,” he said.
“It was like listening to one of my mates on the beers, getting loud and sweary except it’s actually just my dear old nana.”
Mavis denied the characterisation provided by her grandson. “Oh no, deary I wouldn’t say anything like that, ooh no..
“But in all fairness, most of the people on the roads these days are f***in maniacs,” she whispered cautiously, looking around.
“Well they are a pack of f***in c***s, most of them. If you’re turning a corner, how hard is it to f***in indicate?”
Jackson has a theory about the dramatic change in his grandmother. “I guess most of the time she’s just driving by herself so there’s no one there to hear what a filthy mouth she has. She’s probably used to verbally abusing everyone outside her car and getting away with it!
“It’s a bit like keyboard warriors. When you can be anonymous then it’s easy to just go around being violently abusive without any blowback. She’s just got onto Facebook actually, I hate to think what kinds of filth she posts in the comments.”
More to come.