Parliamentary Service Lad Remains Tight-Lipped About Which MPs Are Dickheads In Real Life
NOT WHO YOU’D EXPECT.
25-year-old James* (who, for reasons of his own, only goes by “James”) works as an advisor in our nation’s parliament. James recently shared with friends that he’s spent the last two years accumulating top-secret intel on the MPs he works with.
CAR POOL CONUNDRUM: Seymour Arrives To Pick Up Chippy For Work In The Land Rover
“UNSUITABLE BEHAVIOUR!”
Chris “Chippy” Hipkins’ blood pressure reached new heights this morning. That’s because his parliament carpool buddy David Seymour arrived at his house in the same old land rover he’d tried to drive up the parliament steps earlier this week.
Hipkins Wishing His Positive RAT Could Have Come During Charlotte Bellis Fiasco
GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Politics COULD HAVE USED THE TIME OFF Covid-19 Response Minister Chris Hipkins is thinking about what could have been, after a recent RAT detected COVID-19 in his mucus sample. This comes a month and a half after the Charlotte-Bellis-Afghanistan-pregnancy-MIQ PR disaster, where he could have used a break from work. Yesterday he […]
Local Landscaper Keen To Lock In Hole-Digging Expert
GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Local Whakataki Landscaping owner-operator Troy Sullivan has allegedly been in touch with COVID-19 Response Minister Chris Hipkins after he demonstrated a seemingly effortless ability to dig himself a colossal hole. This follows Hipkins’ mishandling of the Charlotte Bellis MIQ debacle. Sullivan, 48, said he’s never seen someone dig themselves such a big […]
