GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Politics
CLOSE CALL
Green Party co-leader Chlöe Swarbrick has reportedly breathed a deep sigh of relief this week knowing that the latest political spectacle did not directly involve one of her MPs.
The drama began when Winston Peters’ address was posted online for a Palestine protest and a crowbar was later used to smash one of his windows. The Greens naturally feared the worst, given their track record of MP resignations, controversies and crimes.
But insiders say Swarbrick was quietly relieved to learn that the culprit was actually not from her caucus.
“She muttered something like ‘oh phew it wasn’t one of us’,” said a party staffer.
Actor Acacia O’Connor was the person who shared Peters’ address online, to get people to come to the protest. But although she stood alongside Swarbrick at one press conference, the party is thankful there are no calls for more Green MPs to resign or be sacked.
“We were all kind of glancing around, like we had dodged a bullet,” said one Greens staffer. “I had already got the list out again to see who would be next into parliament.”
That relief is understandable. The Greens have endured a string of embarrassing exits including Golriz Ghahraman, Darleen Tana and Benjamin Doyle.
Swarbrick is said to have quietly thanked both Allah and Papatuanuku for her blessings, before reminding her remaining MPs that “we’re here to do politics, not damage windows.”
Winston Peters is dining out on the free publicity of course, and using his gift effectively to pummel both the Greens and their woke ideology in parliament. Meanwhile, Swarbrick is enjoying a rare moment of calm, sipping coffee and patting herself on the back for keeping her MPs in check.
“She deserves a break,” a staffer said. “Although historically the Greens are the party of shoplifting, migrant exploitation and disturbing instagram accounts, we are not the party of violence.”
More to come.
