2ND ON THE TABLE: Cautious Warriors Fan Reminds Friends They’ve Been Hurt Before
DEJA VU
CANTERBURY FLOODS: Private School Girl Forced To Take Family Boat To School
DAD’S ARK.
Winston Peters Seen Captaining Aratere Ferry Through Christchurch
SELWYN’S SAVIOUR
BEFORE I GO: Tory Whanau Promises To Address Zombie Outbreak At Johnsonville Mall
MALL OF THE DEAD.
Local Loser Still Thinks “Open To Work” Banner Makes Him Look ‘Hungry’ Not ‘Hopeless’
GOING NOWHERE.
Public Service Team Meeting Off To A Flyer After Attendees Robotically Recite The Ministry Karakia
SETTING THE TONE.
Orange Demon From Hell Reminds People It Knows Where They Live
ALWAYS WATCHING.
Corin Dann Books In Three Nice Chlöe Interviews To Make Up For That Mean Winston One
BALANCED REPORTING.
Wellingtonians Vote To Replace Eagles At Wellington Airport With Cully And Captain Hurricane
WINDS OF CHANGE.
Local Man Feels Like He’s Been Nailed To The Cross After Not Stocking Up On Good Friday Beers
UNFORGIVABLE.
