GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Local
NEW ICE PRINCESS IN TOWN
Local father Jordie Jacobsen couldn’t be prouder as his 6 year old daughter Charlotte unceremoniously ripped down her Frozen Elsa poster, and replaced it with a poster of gold medal-winning Olympian snowboarder Zoi Sadowsky-Synnott.
“Yesss good on ya Char, get it outta here. No need to watch that movie again ay hun”, said the father of two, still traumatized from watching Frozen more than thirty times.
This comes after New Zealand’s best Winter Olympics ever, where Sadowsky-Synnott claimed gold and silver medals, and more recently halfpipe skier Nico Porteous won gold in his event.
The Whakataki Times explored why Jacobsen now had a sore hand from gleefully fist-pumping the top of his living room door frame. “I’m mainly just pleased that Charlotte’s found herself a proper female role model to look up to. Zoi’s great, she’s a positive influence on Charlotte and she’s showing what can be achieved through hard work and determination.
“So much better than bloody Elsa from that hideous movie. God it’s horrendous,” spat Jacobsen in disgust.
Jacobsen confirmed that he is in two minds about whether he should keep his Disney Plus subscription, where Frozen and Frozen 2 are still very much available. “Well the only reason I got it was for the Star Wars stuff, and the Boba Fett series has just finished so maybe I’ll cancel it for now.
“No point having bloody Frozen available in the house. Better for Char to focus on Zoi and other positive kiwi sportswomen like the Black Ferns Sevens at the last Olympics, gee they were good.
“Fuckin Frozen can get fucked, sorry Elsa you’re out. Bad fuckin luck, maybe you should just… let it go?” Jacobsen laughed maniacally.
More to come.
Want to keep up with more of the news that’s important? Instagram works well for that! Check out the Whakataki Times on Insta.
