Local Bloke Putting Back His Sixth Beer Claims He’ll Get Up For Dawn Service
GOOD INTENTIONS!
Jake Symons, 26, has fooled absolutely nobody after making the outlandish claim that he’ll be getting up at the crack of dawn on a public holiday for the Anzac service.
Man Describes Flavours He’s Detecting In Craft Beer Whether Friends Want To Hear It Or Not
OOH THAT’S HOPPY.
35 year old Hayden Carson put his friends through the ringer yesterday afternoon, when he inevitably got onto his favourite topic of discussion – craft beer.
Man Has Two Midweek Craft Beers And Goes Home At Reasonable Hour
MONDAY MODERATION.
A Christchurch man made history at The Good Home restaurant and bar today.
Local Man Subtly Alludes To Air Travel By Posting Pic Of Beer And Boarding Pass
HIGH FLYER.
Christchurch local Stephen Lowe has given his Instagram followers a little clue about what he’s up to this weekend.
The direct sales consultant has coolly posted a picture of his Air New Zealand boarding pass, as he waits for his flight to Auckland for a mate’s stag do.
“Just jet-setting up to Auckland for another staggy, second one in six months haha, no biggie,” said the man, pleased as punch with himself.
Man Genuinely Asks If He Can Use Afterpay To Pay For Craft Beers
LEGIT QUESTION.
Tim Jones doesn’t usually mind getting the first round of drinks for his best mate Sam.
However at a quaint bar on Wellington’s Lambton Quay, Tim nearly had a mild stroke when the bartender pushed the EFTPOS machine towards him, as it proudly displayed the amount to pay as $29.00.
Staring at the two golden looking hazy IPA’s he just ordered, he thought there’d been some sort of mistake, or that the bartender thought he ordered three in total.
Man Starting On Beers At Midday Under Impression He’ll Make It To Midnight Countdown
BIG SHIFT.
Brad Owens, a 25-year-old from Wellington, is embarking on a New Year’s mission of epic proportions in the Coromandel this year.
Armed with an 18-pack of Heinekens, Brad had become fully convinced that starting on beers at midday was the key to making it to the midnight countdown with both wit and wits intact.
After returning from the supermarket with enough alcohol to last a few days, at 12:02pm Brad cracked open a beer, which piqued the interest of his mates nearby..
Increase In Midweek Beers Inspires Auckland CEO To Strategically Give Up On December
LOST CAUSE.
The Chief Executive of a small Auckland insurance firm has made a controversial move late in 2023.
Robert Davies, CEO of Blue Tick Insurance, has noticed the uptick in his staff going for beers early in the afternoon, and has decided to let it be, even if sales end up being flat for the month.
“It’s a strategic decision that will pay off in the long run. The team has worked hard all year and the worst thing I could do for motivation right now would be to get on people’s cases about leaving early,” he said while enjoying a beer in the office himself.
EVOLUTIONARY SCIENCE: Warmth And Sunlight During Afternoon Stimulates Brain’s Biological Urge For A Beer
IT’S SCIENCE.
Local neurologist Jacko Callahan has proven what we all knew to be true – that a bit of sunshine in the afternoon is likely to make you want a beer.
This time however, there’s science to back up the theory.
Dr Callahan says that inside every human’s ‘reptile brain’ (also known as the amygdala) there are photoreceptors that are triggered by afternoon light.
“The angle and frequency of specifically afternoon light is something that makes our brains seek out a sense of fun and relaxation,” explained Dr Callahan as he quickly wiped away the beer he had spilled on his lab coat.
National Party Leader Stocks Up On Hellers Snags And Wakachangi Beer For Election BBQ
FUNNY THAT.
Christopher Luxon has made another bold decision as leader of the National Party, stocking up exclusively on Hellers sausages and Wakachangi beer ahead of his election day barbie.
Instead of opting for an assortment of gourmet dishes and fine wines, Luxon decided to go for something that resonates with everyday kiwi battlers.
“Gidday maaaate” Luxon greeted our reporters, stocking up his fridge for his election party on Saturday night, where he is hopeful of becoming Prime Minister.
SPRING TIME: Warmer Weather Leads To After-Work Beer Proposal Gathering Momentum
ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Culture FULL STEAM AHEAD Kori Lee couldn’t hide his smile as the warm sun shone through his office window in Christchurch this afternoon. The 29-year-old, typically stuck in his cubicle, felt uplifted after his friend Ben responded to his earlier text suggesting a post-work beer with a simple “You keen?” ” Yeah […]
