WIRED AWAKE: Health Guru Who Preaches 8 Hours Sleep Each Night Now On Fourth Line At Electric Ave
SWEET DREAMS.
Local Woman Who Does No Exercise And Only Eats Rubbish Asks Why She Feels “Tired All The Time”
ENERGY MYSTERY.
Man Can’t Understand Why Girlfriend Is Too Tired for Sex After Doing His Laundry And Cooking His Meals
WHERE’S THE ROMANCE?!
Bloke Who’s Never Left The West Coast Confident He’d Hate Auckland
ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY.
One Person Single-Handedly Responsible For 97% Of Group Chat Activity
OVERACTIVE.
Man Spends $2k On Fishing Rods And Gets Nothing But Sunburn And Fish And Chips
DROUGHT ON THE OCEAN.
Hapless Boyfriend Of Instagram Gets Wheeled Out For Cherry Blossom Photoshoot
CHERRY PICKED CONTENT.
Groundbreaking Research Finds Cats Still Massive Jerks
FELINE FACTS.
Local Man’s Sistema Container Gets Forcefully Chucked In Cupboard Like The Rest Of Them
NO RESPECT.
Flatmate Who Said They’d Do Dishes ‘After Dinner’ Now Entering Day 5 Of Standoff
BENCH BATTLE.
