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man on couch thinking of fireworks celebration

NO PLANS YET: Local Bloke Still Pretending He’ll Be Invited Somewhere For New Year’s

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jetstar flight attendant in front of planes

REPORT: Jetstar In Fact Just Another Normal Airline That’s No Better Or Worse Than The Others

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man looking at powerade bottle in Night n day store.

Local Bloke Leans Into Tomorrow’s Hangover With Pre-Purchased Blue Powerade

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man out running thinking about xmas food

Man Punishes Self With Excruciating Boxing Day Run After Outrageous Christmas Feast

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girl getting iphone and boy getting puzzle

Sibling Tension Peaks As One Child Clearly Gets Better Gift

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mum screaming at christmas

CHRISTMAS LUNCH PREGAME: Local Mum Attempts To Elevate Family’s Stress Levels To Match Hers

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lad sitting by xmas tree with socks and undies

COMING OF AGE: Local Lad Genuinely Grateful To Get Socks And Undies For Christmas

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man under pressure in shopping mall.

Last Minute Christmas Shopper Angered By “All The People” Despite Being One Of Them

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man talking to shop assistant in skincare shop

Bloke Purchasing Skincare Christmas Gift For Girlfriend Nods Along With Shop Assistant Like He’s Across It

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man eating pie in front of Night 'n Day shop

Night ’n Day Pie Warms Both Hands And Soul Of Hungover Tradie

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DISCLAIMER: NZ satire and NZ comedy have a long tradition. The Whakataki Times is a satirical news meme website, which means the stories and memes are made up for comedic effect.