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andrew bayly giving massage

PERSONAL TOUCH: Andrew Bayly Launches New Business Offering An ‘Angry Massage’

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swarbrick thinking about dirty keffiyehs

Swarbrick Cops It At Green Party Fines Session After Forgetting To Wash The Team Kit

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man standing in front of parliament

Parliamentary Service Lad Remains Tight-Lipped About Which MPs Are Dickheads In Real Life

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chippy dismayed to see seymour at his house in land rover

CAR POOL CONUNDRUM: Seymour Arrives To Pick Up Chippy For Work In The Land Rover

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chris luxon with pharmac and red poppies

Chris Luxon Pressing Pharmac To Fund Treatment For Tall Poppy Syndrome

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tory whanau and hikoi

REINVIGORATING THE CAPITAL: Wellington Mayor Secretly Hoped Hikoi Would Turn Into Three Week Stay

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david seymour thinking of tvnz with crowd of people in background

BIG TURNOUT: Executives At TVNZ Consulting David Seymour On How To Attract An Audience

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seymour making coffee with thoughts of hikoi

Seymour Set To Revitalise Wellington Hospo Industry By Attracting 30,000 Visitors To The Capital

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Tory from Turners with great Honda Civic on display

Tory From Turners Gets Ahead Of The Game By Giving Crown Observer Great Deal On Honda Civic

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chloe swarbrick haunted by former MPs

Chloe Triple Checks That New MP Hasn’t Been Doing Any Shoplifting Or Migrant Exploitation

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DISCLAIMER: NZ satire and NZ comedy have a long tradition. The Whakataki Times is a satirical news meme website, which means the stories and memes are made up for comedic effect.