CNN Now Saying Virus Probably Came From That Big Building Full Of Viruses

guards outside Wuhan Institute Of Virology

GORDON LIGHTFOOT | World OH REAL? Very mainstream news provider CNN reported yesterday that the virus that went around the world over the last couple of years likely did come from the Wuhan Institute of Virology, a very large building that contains many viruses.  The news came as a shock to most of the general […]

Man Leans In To Sunday Hangover By Extending It To Monday

man asleep on couch with maccas and sport on tv

GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Culture JUST EMBRACE IT Sam Westman, a recruitment advisor at a top agency in Hamilton, has taken a novel approach to his semi-frequent Sunday hangover.  The 24 year old is by no means drinking as much as he was in his uni days, however he does still find himself dangerously hungover on […]

Losing A Company Laptop Definitely Not As Bad As Losing 3.2 Tonnes Of Cocaine

woman looking sheepish next to laptop and cocaine with floating shipment of cocaine in background next to navy ship

ROSEMARY ABBOTT | National  THE BOSS WON’T BE HAPPY  One South American drug lord out there won’t be a happy chappy today. Whoever the unlucky crime boss is, they have just lost 3.2 tonnes of their cocaine, half a billion dollars worth, after it was intercepted by the Royal New Zealand Navy. The Whakaktai Times […]

LIFE GOES ON: Undeterred By Flooding, Auckland Teen Ramraids Dairy In Motorboat

boat in dairy

GORDON LIGHTFOOT | National RESILIENCE Amid all the destruction in Auckland at the moment due to unprecedented flash flooding over the weekend, one teen showed us that it would take more than a bit of rain to slow him down.  Dylan Mathieson, 15, refused to let flooding get in the way of his goals yesterday, […]

Auckland Dad Who Usually Says “We Needed This Rain” Now Very Quiet

man in front of flooded road

ROSEMARY ABBOTT | National DOSE OF REALITY Auckland dad Simon Johnson is usually quite vocal about how he believes a good downpour of rain is needed for his garden at his Takapuna home. However after witnessing Auckland’s torrential flooding over the past 48 hours, the 46 year-old father of two has been uncharacteristically quiet. “Usually […]

Hungover Bloke Ignores Cafe Menu And Robotically Orders The Big Breakfast

Lethargic looking man with thought bubble thinking about cooked breakfast.

ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Culture  “JUST THE BIG BREKKIE FOR ME THANKS” Liam Hunt was certain about one thing this morning. That was he knew he’d be ordering whatever big breakfast option the menu provided at Wanaka’s Urban Grind Eatery & Bar. The certainty comes after the 29 year-old spent last night with a group of […]

Mike Hosking Allegedly “Did A Little Dance”

Mike Hosking dancing in a park

GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Politics “YOU’RE IN A GOOD MOOD MIKE” An unnamed source close to veteran broadcaster Mike Hosking claims that he “did a little dance”, and that we all know why.  The claim is eerily similar to someone else who in June 2020 said that she “did a little dance” because she thought that […]

HOLIDAY MISHAP: Woman Forgets To Post Aerial Photo From Inside Plane

GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Culture MISSED OPPORTUNITY Holly Carrigan, 25, missed a golden opportunity this morning. She had the chance to deliver top quality pre-holiday content to her numerous instagram followers, which would have been the perfect start to her trip to Queenstown – but she absolutely blew it.  As she sat on the Air New […]