Local Bloke Flicks Kelvin Davis An Email Just To Check If He’s Māori Enough To Call Himself Māori
GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Politics JUST TO BE SAFE Small business owner Zane Williams, 31, has always been proud of his Māori heritage, but he is now questioning whether he is in fact Māori enough to call himself Māori. Just to make sure that he is still allowed to carry on with the identity he’s had […]
ONE WERE WARRIORS: New Sponsorship Deal Means All Warriors Games Will Now Be On Channel One
ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Sport LETS ONE WARRIORS Following the news that Vodafone have rebranded themselves as ‘One New Zealand’, the Vodafone Warriors have now announced that they will now be called the One New Zealand Warriors and all their games will now be on Channel One. Vodafone has had a long standing relationship with the […]
Marketing Genius Renames Vodafone Something Forgettable And Flushes All Brand Recognition Down The Toilet
GORDON LIGHTFOOT | National START AGAIN Vodafone, a very well known telecommunications company with a very recognisable name and logo, have decided the best strategy now is to trash all of that and start from scratch. The phone and internet providers have given up the rights to their global brand name, Vodafone, and will now […]
NATIONAL STILL AHEAD IN THE POLLS: Hosking Jumps In The Maserati And Boosts Into Work Ten Hours Early
ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Politics CAN’T WAIT FOR THE CALLERS It was like Christmas morning in September for Newstalk ZB talkback host Mike Hosking tonight. The popular broadcaster was overcome with excitement after seeing another very favourable TVNZ 1 News Kantar Poll for National, so much so that he decided to head straight to the NZME […]
Local Bloke Just Getting His Food Truck Business Off The Ground Really Stoked About Another Public Holiday
GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Culture “OH YEAH LOVE A LONG WEEKEND” Budding entrepreneur Michael Suarez is glad to have the Queen’s memorial day behind him. He has just spent the last week listening to every other customer coming up to his new Argentinian food truck, talking about how good it is to get another long weekend. […]
Dunedin Bloke With Part Time Newspaper Delivery Job A Bit Reluctant To Wear The New Jumper Nana Knitted Him
ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Culture “AH, THANKS NANA” Scott Tindell is in a bit of a dilemma. It’s not that he’s struggling to deliver all the newspapers for his regular paper run, it’s just that his nana has knitted him a very distinctive jersey with red and yellow geometric shapes, nearly identical to the one this […]
Local Dad Relieved To Watch A Stress-Free All Blacks Match Where They Absolutely Dominate
GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Sport “AH THIS IS MORE LIKE IT” Last night’s Bledisloe Cup match felt like a return to normality for Graham Darby, the Taranaki father of four grown up children. Not just because the All Blacks won, but because they gave away no clues of there being a possibility that they might lose. […]
“WTF Is This?” Asks Kiwi Who Still Can’t Explain Rugby’s Scrum Resets And Turnover Penalties
ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Sport “THAT’S A KNOCK-ON ISN’T IT?” Harry Knight was getting ready for the All Blacks v Wallabies Bledisloe Cup match this afternoon when he decided to have a scroll through the other sports that were on in the lead up to the big game. However Knight was then glued to the TV […]
Local Bloke Enjoys A Few Beers In Town, Keeps GF In The Loop And Then Returns Home At A Reasonable Hour
ROSEMARY ABBOTT | Culture FRESH AS A DAISY Dan Blundell was as chipper as ever this morning. The 27 year-old who works as a sales associate in Christchurch was up bright and early, despite the fact he went for some beers with a couple of mates who were in town last night. Blundell has turned […]
Local Man Consciously Shifts Focus From Depressing World News To The Rugby
GORDON LIGHTFOOT | Sport THINK LOCAL With the passing of Queen Elizabeth and World War III just around the corner, Palmerston North man Jordie Carson has intelligently chosen to re-focus on issues closer to home. Carson is pushing the confusing state of the Ukraine conflict to the side for now, so that he can instead […]
