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Dave McMillan in a comatose state after four beers in the sun.

Man Heavily Sedated After Four Beers In The Sun

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Man sweating looking for wifi password on router

Man Feels Like He’s Defused A Bomb After Successfully Entering Wifi Password On Back of Router

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Uncle Darryl cuts to the chase and gets insanely drunk at Christmas

Uncle Cuts To The Chase And Gets Insanely Drunk and Obnoxious At Christmas Lunch

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local relieved about RnV postponement

Local Bloke Shredding For RnV Not Tracking Well And Relieved With Postponement

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Lawyer and equestrian breaking lockdown rules at Whakataki Lakes

Really, Really Unpredictable Outcome For Rich, Privileged Aucklanders

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Four-Year-Old Loses All Trust In Father After Being Pinched By Bicycle Helmet Click Buckle

Four-Year-Old Loses All Trust In Father After Being Pinched By Bicycle Helmet Click Buckle

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woman shocked at price of wine corkage

Woman Sinks To New Low With $6 Bottle Of Wine Ahead Of $10 Corkage

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Dave Gallagher has impressed by purchasing four buckets of CookieTime Christmas cookies

Quiet Guy In The Office Makes A Splash With Large-Scale Purchase Of Christmas Cookies

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Olivia Bancroft frustrated about leaving reusable shopping bags at home in the garage

Local Woman Forgets Reusable Shopping Bags Again, Adds Another Tier To The Pile In The Garage

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crossfitter disappointed

Cross-fit Gym Cancels Bloke’s Membership After His Repeated Failure To Post Workout Pics On Instagram

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DISCLAIMER: NZ satire has a long tradition. The Whakataki Times is a satirical news website, which means the stories are made up for comedic effect.