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Lesbian woman recoiling at babies crawling

Local Lesbian Sick of Explaining “My Cats Are My Children”

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Pink haired woman at races thinking about champagne breakfast

CUP WEEK: Anti Racing Activist Urged To Consider The Joy Of A Champagne Brekky And Day On The Punt

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Woman cuddling sad-looking dog.

“My Dog is My Closest Friend” Claims Woman Whose Pet Clearly Resents Her

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Man working at his desk while thinking of beers.

Office Employee’s Top Priority For Friday Morning Is Gauging Numbers For Work Drinks

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woman texting about dirty dishes on the bench

Flatmate Fires Through Another Passive Aggressive Message To The Group Chat About Dishes

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woman crying with cocktail and 30th birthday balloons

Millennial Defies Ageing By Behaving Like Spoilt Child on 30th Birthday

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Man wincing with the 2022 Melbourne Cup winner in the background, along with a thought bubble with the Back to the Future movie in it.

Local Bloke Once Again Walks Away From Melbourne Cup Wishing He Had A Time Machine

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Pink haired woman in front of horse that jockey is about to mount with whip

REVEALED: Anti-Whipping Anti-Horseracing Activist Actually Enjoys A Bit Of Whipping Herself

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man offering chewing gum to trick or treaters

Man Disappoints Trick-Or-Treating Kids By Offering Sticks Of Extra Sugarfree Chewing Gum

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air nz flight attendant with sickbag in background

Sick Bag On Plane Actually Just For Those Passengers Who Happen To Be Viciously Hungover

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DISCLAIMER: NZ satire and NZ comedy have a long tradition. The Whakataki Times is a satirical news meme website, which means the stories and memes are made up for comedic effect.